Five Introduction Goofs to Avoid

Most introduction mistakes are the result of normal-and forgivable-memory lapses or nervousness. But the foul-ups below result primarily from insensitivity and tactlessness. Don’t: 1) Look Away. People who look over shoulders and around the room while involved in introductions are saying in every way that they don’t really care very much. 2) Make too-personal comments. Divorces, bereavements, job losses, illnesses, rehab history, and the like are not fit subjects to raise in the course of social and business introductions. Ask about family, not spouse. 3) Interrupt. When people are engaged in serious conversation or obviously occupied, don’t break in to introduce someone else. Wait for a more convenient moment. 4) Defer to one person at the expense of the other. Be sure that both parties are included in any conversation that follows a polite introduction. 5) Gush. Most people are embarrassed by overly enthusiastic introductions. A note to would-be matchmakers: While you may think that two eligible people would be perfect couple, avoid exaggerated praise when you introduce them. Flattery is a sign of insincerity.

Perfect Table Settings for Your Holiday Parties

Here are two great pictures to help you set the perfect table for your upcoming parties. These are also great to use to teach the kids which fork or glass is theirs if they go to these parties with you. The easiest reminder to me is bring both index fingers to the thumbs. That makes a "b" and a "d" so you can always know which plate is your "b" bread plate and "d" drink glass. Enjoy! And here's to not doing the glass pass because someone picked up the wrong one! Happy dining! Marty

Connectors

Now is a great time to be a connector for people. Everyone is having parties. But some friends may be without jobs or transitioning.  The holidays give a great opportunity to help get those friends networking. If appropriate with your host, invite those friends out to your holiday parties. Your church, your charities, and other friends will all be hosting parties now and it's usually ok with a host for you to bring a +1. Make sure you introduce them to new people and tell them about people who may be there so your friends can do some mingling on their own.  These new connections may be the best gift you give these friends. 

Get jolly and get connecting!!

Marty

Party Tips for the Holidays (or any days)

Now is the time of holiday parties galore!! Here are a few tips when attending these events. 1) Don't be late. There is no excuse and your hosts have worked very hard at preparing a wonderful meal. 2) Bring the hosts a gift such as a bottle of wine, flowers and/or fine chocolates. Don't bring a gift that you expect them to use at the meal or event that night. The host knows his or her plan for the evening, so don't expect your gift to be fit into that. 3) If you've offered to bring a dessert, bring dessert, not cranberry chutney as a surprise. That throws off the aforementioned plan. 4) Don't get a second helping until everyone has been served. 5) Always offer to help in the kitchen with prep work, clean up and wash dishes. 6) Turn off your cellphone. 7) Give thanks and if appropriate, toast your hosts. A great website for ideas on great toasts is http://toastsbook.com. Happy Holidays! And here's to some great parties along the way! Marty

Meetings - Host's Duties

When conducting a meeting, it is important for the host to get the time, place and agenda set. This means that you ensure the timing works for all necessary attendees and you have prepared an adequate space and time for the meeting. Further, it is important for the host to explain the purpose of the meeting. Do not just call a meeting without giving details of what will be expected of attendees (in terms of contribution or preparation). Further, have an agenda for your meeting that you will follow and, if possible, give to everyone ahead of time. Keep the meetings start and ending time (i.e. don't let your meeting drag on - folks are busy and need to get to other tasks). Further, keep the meeting agenda items - only discuss what you came there to discuss. Otherwise, people will not be as prepared and this can cause meetings to overrun their allotted time. Finally, the host should have someone keep a detailed record of meeting and task lists for items after the meeting. That way all will know what is to be accomplished after they leave the meeting. These few points will help make for effective and efficient meetings - so you you and those you work with can get back to the actual doing! Wishing you all brief but productive meetings! Marty Thompson PS Check out my favorite picture at www.despair.com (these guys are genius) that sums up most meetings - may this never happen to you! http://demotivators.despair.com/demotivational/meetingsdemotivator.jpg

Travel - Noises

You have all sat next to someone on a plane or train who has their headphones on so loudly you can sing along with them. You have also sat next to the person that is playing a video game on their phone or Ipad but keeps the volume on so you can hear every gun blast. This message is to all - please please please be cognizant of your own noises from your phones, music, games, and computers. What you hear as white noise can be very disturbing to other passengers. Additionally, keep your own volume to a minimum. I am a loud talker but on planes or trains I try to keep my voice down if talking to my neighbor. I recently had a flight where I could recite the entire conversation between two people a row and an aisle away from me. That's too loud! Know your voice and if your friend does not know his or her own voice - help him and try to keep the talking low (people will often mimic what their partner does or you could politely say I see that man is trying to sleep over there, I think we should try to keep it down). The whole plane will thank you for it! Also I must give a recent kudos to a United flight attendant. She was kind enough to ask a gentleman to turn off the noises from his video game. Not all attendants do that but I really appreciated her effort. Keep it up please for the rest of the plane's sake! To quiet travels, Marty Thompson

Holiday Travel - Timing

Now is the season for holiday travel. That means a lot of opportunities for things to get a little hairy, particularly when bad weather slows down air travel. One of the most important things I have found to help at lease keep me up to the minute in air travel is United's travel updates that they can send by text or by email (www.united.com for details). They are very helpful to let me know the status of my flights. Amtrak also does a nice job of alerting me to train delays (www.amtrak.com) Why does this matter for travel etiquette? It's important not to be late to events where your host has spent a lot of time preparing their home and often big meals for us. We want to be as courteous as possible to those that are graciously hosting us and alert them as soon as we can to delays. Additionally, these little website tricks will help you stay away from the ticket counters that are often filled with folks that really are facing some travel crisis. When I get the alerts I am much more calm about the travel and generally have a better disposition when I get my coffee from the Starbucks barista - and everyone appreciates that! Wishing you a fantastic holiday season and may your planes, trains, and automobiles be on time!